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Understanding Anger in the Parent - Child Relationship

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Understanding Anger in the Parent - Child Relationship

Tips for Working with Young Children

From time to time we all get angry. To understand the role anger plays in the parent-child relationship, you need to understand why your child is behaving in a particular way and your reaction to that behavior.

Remember that children learn by observing and will imitate your behavior. Psychologists have grouped people into three general categories based on how they express anger.

There are people who use a passive style and rarely express anger directly. Instead, this type of person stuffs their anger inside. Unresolved issues build up until the person explodes.

The second group are people who use an aggressive style to dominate others and control the situation.

The third group are people who use an assertive style to express anger and communicate their feelings without blaming the other person. The focus is on the behaviors involved, not on the person's character.

Most often, anger is the result of misunderstandings. For example, let's say you have just finished dressing your child in his best clothes. Then while you take care of last-minute details, your child goes outside and gets dirty. You might think your child is acting defiantly. The child simply may have gotten bored and went outside, forgetting that he was wearing her good clothes.

Anger is a normal part of human relationships, understanding why we react in anger is important.

Source: Nebraska Extension NuFacts

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